Making Mistakes OK

"Teach your students that it's all right to make mistakes. Mistakes aren't reasons for shame but chances to learn and do better." This quote is taken from Teacher Therapy written by Karen Katafiasz. Albert Einstein said that some of his greatest ideas became successful from the mistakes he made before hand. Benjamin Franklin said that it was his mistakes that gave him further ideas for some of his greatest inventions. Today I see students get frustrated and freeze up when they make a mistake or are not sure of themselves. They would rather skip something than get it wrong. Making mistakes is a part of learning. We will not do everything perfectly; very rarely are things done perfectly. As part of being a winner for your students, you create a classroom that encourages thinking outside the box, trying new ideas, and making mistakes just a part of the learning process. It is so important to let the students have time to rework problems after they missed them and it has been reviewed so they have a chance to be successful at it. The more success they feel, the more self worth and self esteem they gain. You never know what great minds you have coming through your class that will help defeat cancer or find a cure for ALS, or make the first exhaust free vehicle that will help close the whole in the ozone layer rather than make it bigger. They may never feel the self confidence to try out their ideas if they feel ashamed of their mistakes they make early in their educational careers. Encourage your students to try their ideas out, especially in the math and science areas. Think of the hidden poets you have in your class or the next great novelist. We are teaching our future...think about that. If you really think about it hard enough, it boggles the mind. Our future teachers, executives, politicians, artists, scientists, doctors, farmers, mechanics....ect. Wow!, what a thought. I won't be looking for perfection when I get older. I will be looking for problem solvers, inventors that will make our world a safer, more organic, and planet friendly place for all the future generations. We learn from mistakes. What ideas will our students get from the mistakes they make now? We may never know if we don't encourage them to learn from their mistakes and take their ideas further.

Sticking with Winners part 3

I have written about sticking with winners and being a winner for your child. I have also written how teachers and school staff can be winners for students. There is also an important part to this for adults as well. We need to stick with winners ourselves. These people will be those that we can tell anything to in confidence, those that encourage us, and those that will talk at all hours of the night.

Adults need to be supported with winners just as much, if not more than our children. Think about a person you work with who is always negative, never has a positive thing to say, or is always miserable. Is this person a winner for you? Do they uplift you? Do they tell you good job or encourage you? Do you like spending time with this person? Are they good for your self esteem and self worth? If you can not answer yes to these questions, then this person is not a winner for you.

I have found out in the last two months how amazing sticking with winners can be. I had a support group to call on at anytime, but I did not feel like I could bother them with my “stuff” because they have their own things they are dealing with. When I allowed myself to trust these people and to be open and honest with them, it was a huge lift for my self esteem and my emotional health. They encourage me every day by calling, emailing, or texting me. They check in with me, especially during difficult times. I know I can call on these people at any time, day or night, and they will be there for me. These are my winners. These are the people I want to spend my time with when I can.

There are people that I have had to let go and quit hanging around because they were not winners for me. They made me feel inadequate, incapable, and incompetent. Whenever something good happened for me, they found a negative to it to bring me down. There are others that were a bad influence on me. They encouraged risky behaviors and taunted and picked at me until I went along. Sometimes these people can be best friends, family members, or coworkers and it can be very hard to get away from them. There are some family members that I don’t spend time with anymore because they are not winners for me. There are co workers that I avoid because they are not helpful to me. It is a choice, often difficult, to make about who are winners and non winners in your life. The best litmus test for me has been how I felt after an experience with a person. If I felt uplifted and supported, I know that person is a winner for me. If I felt nervous, upset, or let down, then I know that person is not a winner for me.

Sticking with winners are very important to everyone. We all need winners in our lives. Can you think of who are the winners in your life? Are there some who are not and you need to get rid of? Who are you a winner for?

Sticking with Winners part 1

Sticking With Winners

Posted by Tricia Spencer at 3/2/2011 8:00:00 AM

Sticking with winners...that was a topic I heard about at a meeting I attended the other night. Two questions were asked; "Are you a winner for your kids?" and "Are you sticking with winners for yourself"? What does a "winner" look like? Is it someone who is really good at what they do? Is it someone who does everything correct? Is it someone who is liked by everyone? Webster dictionary defines being a winner as: one that wins admiration or one that is successful especially through praiseworthy ability and hard work. In other words, a winner is someone who is inspiring and good to be around. Today I would like to talk about being a winner for your child.

The question asked about are you a winner for your child really took me back and made me think. I thought it was a no brainer. Of course, I am a winner for my child. But, as the conversation began, I started to hear ways in which I probably was not a winner for my child. Parents spoke about not encouraging their child enough, not praising them enough, not spending quality time just talking and listening to them. So, I started thinking about all the ways I was not a winner for my child. I have teenagers and that makes it even harder to be a winner for them because they act like they don't want you anywhere near them. It is different when your children are in elementary school and they still see you as their hero. Then, it is easy to be a winner to them. You applaud all their firsts and encourage them to keeping going further.They make it very easy to be a winner to them.

As children grow older, developmentally, they tend to push away from their parents and look towards their peers to be their "winners". They get their affirmations from their friends and that is who they want to spend all their time with. It is at this time that we need to be "winners" the most for our children. This can look many ways and you have just try things to see what gets their attention. It can be as simple as saying, " I love you" when you see them come through the door. It can be that you stop what you are doing, sit down with your child and ask them how their day went. Let them lead the conversation and you listen. Even a quick text message of "have a good day" or "luv ya" can send the message that you are pulling for your child and you are thinking about them. Being a winner for your child shows that you are interested in their life and you are their cheerleader no matter what.

I was very humbled by the conversation. I had given up on trying to connect with my child because I did not think he wanted to talk or to hear from me. I took the fact that he wanted to be with his friends more than with me, that I did not matter in his life. The fact is, no matter their age, your child needs you to be a winner for them. Encourage them, talk with them, spend time with them, and love them. Be their cheerleader.

What will you do to be a winner to your child today? I will be texting mine...and that is a start.

Sticking with winners- part 2

Sticking with Winners part 2- Being a Winner for your Students.

Posted by Tricia Spencer at 3/4/2011 12:00:00 AM

Sticking with winners is not just something we can do for our own children. We can be winners for our students as well. We are the first in line after parents to be winners for these students. Just as we would be winners for our own children, we should do the same for our students. It may look a little different but it still will bring great dividends in the effort you get from your students. Webster dictionary defines being a winner as: one that wins admiration or one that is successful especially through praiseworthy ability and hard work. In other words, a winner is someone who is inspiring and good to be around. A winner is someone who sets an example and is a good role model.

Sometimes we may be the only winners in a student’s life. Most of our students grow up in families where parents work two or three jobs, work out of town, or work a shift where they are asleep during the time the child is home. They also may live in a one parent family and do not have good role models. So what would being a winner look like?

• Welcoming them every morning with a smile no matter how you feel- every day.
• Giving them time to work on homework they may not have completed the night before because they had to babysit a sibling or couldn’t figure it out.
• Giving them a chance to complete homework during the day because you know they will not be supported at home.
• Praise them for improvements. Even if they made a D on a test this week…it is an improvement from the F they made last week.
• Listen to them. Give them a chance to share their life with you.
• Sit with them at lunch and share some stories of your school experience with them.
• Start each day as a new day…what happened yesterday is over. Today they are your favorite student again.
• Let them believe you are proud of them.
• Let them know you believe in them.

My three most favorite teachers were teachers like this. I was an at risk child in school. I lived in a single parent family, my parent worked all the time so I was left alone a lot. I had lots of opportunities to get into trouble, to skip school or be a behavior problem. Fourth and fifth grade were really rough years for me. My teachers just knew I would never finish school and so they gave up on me. Ms. Greenwood was my 6^th grade teacher and she was incredible. She hugged me every morning and made me feel important. She would help me with my homework or give me time to finish it. But, the greatest thing she did was to listen to me. She may have thought I would never make it through high school or even make it out of the 6^th grade, but she never let me know that. She always encouraged me, helped me, and told me she was proud of me. The other two teachers were my 7^th and 8^th grade teachers. They were a lot like her. It is because of these women, these teachers, these winners, that pushed me towards education. I wanted to be a winner for other students like these women were winners for me.

If you do these things and the students know you care about them, they will gravitate toward you. They know that you are worth sticking with. They know you are a winner for them and they will stick by you.